Have you ever stopped to wonder, that Bray Wyatt looks like Mike Rotunda?
They’re father and son, and on the quiet, IRS begat the family Wyatt.
So when the Taxman was doing audits, one day his lad would take the plaudits
And as Irwin was stinging you for quite a few grand, one day his lad would have the world in his hand.
But before his Wyatt guise
And the fireflies
He would join other guys
Trying to claim the NXT prize
(A reminder – no choking with ties)
The victor was to claim a contract hand-out
But there was no doubt who was the stand-out
Like the mighty Eiffel towers above Paris
Step forward our boy, Husky Harris.
On NXT shows they had rookie and pros, much like Jarrett had tutored The Roadie
They looked at Big Husky, who looked quite like Dusty, and decided to stick him with Cody.
Not winning the show didn’t make Husky sad, coming fourth actually made him quite smiley,
Despite finishing behind Mr Perfect’s lad, and Miz’s great pal Alex Riley.
Picking out some of the mentors made the show seem occasionally hokey,
But the teaming of winner Kaval with Laycool seemed to work in a manner quite low-key.
Husky, carrying weight around the solar plexus
Teamed up with Nexus
After they’d been quite reckless
Squeezing Justin Roberts’ necklace
Although the end of their push would vex us
The rebirth of Husky would truly perplex us
Some vignettes in Louisiana (or maybe in Texas)
Soon the love for his character was totally infectious.
If you saw this lot in the woods you would try to stay quiet
Luke Harper, Erick Rowan, and the leader Bray Wyatt.
To their dismay
Those who had fallen prey
Were forced to obey
In a backwoods cliché
While big bad Bray
On a rocking chair, would sway
Sitting there, in the deep, deep south
Catching flies in his mouth.
The eater of worlds, citing buzzards to be followed
Soon found that his rhetoric was swallowed
By fans who were keener to be meaner to John Cena.
The path between good guys and heels becoming harder to trace
With dozens of kids with masks on their babyface.
Mary had a little lamb
It’s face was a bit like Rowan
And with every single passing month
Their beards continued growin’.
Momentum began to slow for Bray, though response was never weak
No-one seriously believed that he could break the Taker’s streak.
His feuds began to suffer and the character would pale
Compared to the early days inspired by Sister Abigail.
His Mania match with Orton, a complete horror show
And like the mask on Erick’s face, Bray seemed sure to go.
Might Husky Harris’s new persona
A man happy as leader or loner
Now ignore Abigail’s wish, and completely disown her?
Or had he now completely outgrown her?
Before the last rites had been spoken
The news, to Bray, would soon be broken
That he would work with the man so Woken
But it felt still much like a token
Effort, in banging out encounters shorter than a porn dwarf
They said they were won-der-ful – but they were no Paul Orndorff.
So was Harris, Husky gone, just like Watson, Percy?
But what’s this? A buzzard puppet, wailing mercy.
The Wyatt character in some ways felt like a friend
And this is a gimmick that will never, ever end.
A man with more personas than the singer David Bowie
Was back in business truly with a wowie and a yowie.
The fireflies had reconvened
As soon as the funhouse was first screened
The Wyatt slate had seemingly cleaned
As we all let him in. He is The Fiend.
Running riot on Monday Night Raw
The Fiend developed the mandible claw
All seemingly sedated
Looking comparatively svelte
As he strapped on a new custom belt
For being champ and instilling fear
Then it all ended with spear after spear.
One could say the champ was no longer here.
A rematch? No, Bray was keener
To re-engage with John Cena
Polarizing (or is he a tweener)
Wyatt wanted John to pay for a misdemenaour.
The trip through Cena’s history, for some was not a hit
But others loved the mystery, and said ‘this is such good…’
So all the way from an NXT start and a quick stint in the Nexus
Whether Husky Harris or Bray Wyatt – The Fiend exists to protect us.